Like most geeks, I have some sort of strange affinity for Natalie Portman that I am unable to explain. Despite the crappy roles she often lands (see, for instance Star Wars Episodes 1-3), she never seems to lose her fascination for me. From her role in Luc Besson's The Professional, to the slashdot "hot grits" days, to shaving her head (and actually becoming sexier in the process), Natalie has made a large impact on most of my adult life. The icing on the cake is her collaboration with those Lonely Island boys over at SNL, which somehow just made her that much cooler to me.

I've tried to analyze just what it is that makes her cool, and in the process have come up with a theory. I could just tell you my theory, but I feel that it would best be explained with a diagram:

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