OK. I'm going to postulate a theory, which if correct, might cause me to disappear.
Isaac Hayes is going to die of "complications arising from a stroke" at or near 10:25pm EST on Wednesday the 22nd, at which time South Park will be making fun of him in an uproarious manner. The world will then turn against them for insensitivity, and they'll die alone and pennyless.
This is all part of the continuing plot by Scientologists to teach Trey Parker, Matt Stone, and Comedy Central not to fuck with Xenu.
The author lives in Vancouver, Washington, USA with his girlfriend and a menagerie of cats, rats, fish, birds, guinea pigs and robots.
Among other inanities, he strives to use investigative techniques to work young starlet breasts into every aspect of rational discourse -- focusing on the discourse, thus making it not perverted. Also, has recently begun a career as "Internet hairstylist."
He can be contacted via email and Jabber IM at 'email@example.com'. He likes to be contacted.
(All press inquiries, however, ought be directed towards the author's agent, Alistair Hoel, via email to firstname.lastname@example.org.)