Despite what my little Harry Potter map shows, we are spending the weekend at the coast, in Lincoln City, OR.
The hotel at which we've chosen to stay is pretty crappy, but that's part of the reason we've always opted to stay there. It's cheap, right on the beach, and tucked away off of "the main drag" that makes up Lincoln City.
This time, however, we've found it too be just a bit too cheap for a variety of reasons.
Last night we could tell that the people on the left were watching "CSI: Miami," not because we could hear the TV (well, we could hear the TV, but having never seen "CSI: Miami," we wouldn't know it from "CSI" or "CSI: Lancaster, PA1"), but because we could clearly hear them say "Ooh! Let's watch 'CSI: Miami!'" in an only slightly louder-than-normal voice.
There is no fan in the bathrom, meaning you either have to suffocate in shower steam, or open the window -- the window that is at eye level for anyone who needs to walk by. Everyone needs to walk by. The lack of fan in the bathroom gives those of us with constantly-ringing ears an extra bit of poop-shy that we really don't need. Also, tiiiiny round bowl. Also, 3/4 grit toilet paper (not that I'll be needing that...)
Highlight of the trip so far: while the neighbors were watching "CSI: Miami," they kind of argued a little over something I couldn't make out, and then the guy said "Would you pleaaase get your finger out of my ass?
1: Watching Jebediah, Ezekiel, and Sarah use turn-of-the-century forensic techniques (such as "dusting for dust") to determine who tainted the funnel cake batter, which buggy-racing teens were responsible for the hit-and-run homicide, and whether or not that collapsed rocking chair was foul play might just get me to tune in. (Call me, Jerry!)
The author lives in Vancouver, Washington, USA with his girlfriend and a menagerie of cats, rats, fish, birds, guinea pigs and robots.
Among other inanities, he strives to use investigative techniques to work young starlet breasts into every aspect of rational discourse -- focusing on the discourse, thus making it not perverted. Also, has recently begun a career as "Internet hairstylist."
He can be contacted via email and Jabber IM at 'firstname.lastname@example.org'. He likes to be contacted.
(All press inquiries, however, ought be directed towards the author's agent, Alistair Hoel, via email to email@example.com.)