Essentially it is a Nigerian copycat, but in a stroke of meta that I can only call inspired, the message itself references all the other Nigerian style messages I've been getting, and explains why I've been getting them.
Here's a snip:
I am Revd. Fr. Thomas Douglas, a senior staff with the World Bank fact finding & special duties office. I am writing you this letter based on the fact that a cool penny is better than millions of dollars means it's better for one to live and die a poor honest man than a rich dishonest one.
I and the Chief security officer (CSO) of this organisation have arranged with an officer in the computer section the person of Engineer Peter Cliff to bring out part of your total pending payment with reference number (LM-05-371) amounting to US$10 million. Why we did this is because according to information gathered from the bank
I recently learned of the plagiarism allegations Luixy Toledo has brought against Michael Jackson, and found them somewhat intriguing. Long story short, Luixy alleges that he sent Michael Jackson a copy of his CD in 1974 as a birthday present (because they share the same birthday, August 25th). This CD contained his song Exorcismo. A few years later, Michael released a song called Thriller which Luixy alleges is a copy of Exorcismo. His case was eventually thrown out, the court finding that any similarities are merely coincidental.
A couple days ago I got ahold of a copy of Luixy's song and am finally able to see for myself what the truth is. Rather than tell you what I think, I've prepared an mp3 for your listening pleasure -- Michael in one channel, Luixy in the other. Keep in mind that I did do a little bit of editing on Luixy's track to account for slight tempo variations, but I've included Luixy's original unedited mp3 so you can listen to it for yourself.
I've been getting lots and lots of spam to my Comcast account lately, due to mostly to the fact that those fuckers over there are selling customer email addresses to some nasty people. Way to treat your customers, Comcast!
In any case, I got a couple messages yesterday with identical bodies, the only difference being the sender address and the subject line, so I'm pretty confident that it's actually spam, and not a damsel in distress. Here's the text:
Hello have a good day,
I am not sure where to begin,it is first time I try to use internet to meet the man but the thing is,that I will work abroad I can choice USA,Canada or Europe and I would like to meet the man to share free evenings and be my guide. My friends helped me to send a few letters to different address and I do hope that I am lucky to meet good and kind man.you should know that now I live in Russia and my goal is to leave this country because it is impossible to live here for young pretty woman.they tell I look well enough,I am good looking girl. I will send a few photos if you reply.
if you don't have wife or girlfriend ,maybe we could try to meet?
I am free, I have no children .and I have no boyfriend here.
I am 25 years old ,please write to me directly to my mail- firstname.lastname@example.org See you soon ,with great hope.
This message touched my heart; I feel that I would be neglecting my duty as a human being if I were not to reply. Afterall, maybe the spammers are using this poor girl against her will. In any case, here's my reply:
Thanks for your message of inquiry. I'm always interested in meeting new people, especially attractive Russian girls in need of assistance. I am quite interested in your proposal...
I am sorry to say that I am in fact married, but if that doesn't bother you, I've asked both my wife and my girlfriend how they would feel about making your aquaintence, and so far they are both supportive.
Could you send the pictures you promised in your mail? I am sure that you are in fact very pretty, and honestly, even if you weren't, that would be OK with me -- it's just that my wife is kind of picky about who we share our bed^1^ home with.
Am I correct in expecting that you are going to need a place to live and a job in this country?
I'm not as axious to hear back on this email as I am from the people at Heinz, but I figured it'd help me pass the time between now and Phase 2 of my Heinz campaign. That's when I'm really going to kick it up a notch...
1: In the actual email, I didn't use strike notation, I used oldschool "^h" notation, but that proved impossible to replicate due to the fact that one of my blog markup plugins uses the carot as an indicator to make text be superscripted. That's great to know, and I'll sure be superscripting that way from now on...
WELLINGTON, New Zealand - Organizers of a vintage car rally have hired karate experts to protect vehicles from marauding native parrots, a media report said Friday.
Around 40 members of a local karate club have been enlisted to protect around 140 classic cars due to visit an alpine village near Mt. Cook on New Zealand's South Island on Sunday, the New Zealand Press Association reported.
The karate experts will protect the cars from Keas, sharp-beaked native parrots which have been known to damage vehicles in their search for shiny items, NZPA said.
Denis Callesen, manager of the nearby Hermitage Hotel, said bird lovers needn't be concerned that the karate experts would use martial arts moves on the parrots, which are a protected species. Their job would simply be to scare the birds away, he said.
Local wildlife ranger Ray Bellringer said the karate masters were unlikely to deter the Keas.
A day or so ago, a list of features allegedly ascribed to the upcoming PS3 surfaced online. Here it is for your quick perusal... I'll wait.
* PS3 will have online service that goes beyond Xbox live
* PS3 will be a DVR (Digital Video Recorder)
* It will be able to connect with the PSP
* There are a lot of games being worked on for it right now in the US (a lot more then what people know about)
* The final PS3 dev kit is a lot faster than they thought (according to the developer)
* The PS3 will have an iTunes type service to let you download Hi-Def movies, music, etc
* The PS3 will take the media center functionality the 360 has even further
* PS3 will serve as a location free player for the PSP, means you can watch the DVD’s that you have in your PS3 on your PSP (from anywhere in the world), or any other video files you have on your ps3, though this is still only being planned.
* PS3 will be able to send its files straight to the PSP from anywhere in the world, and it can also control its DVR functionalities
* Firmware updates will add more functionality, much like with the PSP
* The Blu-ray Player functionality doesn't cost as much as a stand alone player because the Cell and RSX can take care of a lot of the stuff the PS3 will need to do to be able to read the disks
* Fall release date for PS3, no release date for online service, but expected to launch with the system
Ok, back with me? I skimmed through the list, and about 3 lines into this list of facts, I was reminded of another list of facts that I've seen online, and decided to particpate in this "mashup" culture that I've been reading so much about. Without further ado, I present my "mashedup" list of facts:
* Chuck Norris will have online service that goes beyond Xbox live
* Chuck Norris will be a DVR (Digital Video Recorder)
* Chuck Norris will be able to connect with the PSP
* There are a lot of games being worked on for Chuck Norris right now in the US (a lot more then what people know about)
* The final Chuck Norris dev kit is a lot faster than they thought (according to the developer)
* Chuck Norris will have an iTunes type service to let you download Hi-Def movies, music, etc
* Chuck Norris will take the media center functionality the 360 has even further
* Chuck Norris will serve as a location free player for the PSP, means you can watch the DVD’s that you have in Chuck Norris on your PSP (from anywhere in the world), or any other video files you have on your ps3, though this is still only being planned.
* Chuck Norris will be able to send its files straight to the PSP from anywhere in the world, and it can also control its DVR functionalities
* Firmware updates will add more functionality to Chuck Norris, much like with the PSP
* The Blu-ray Player functionality doesn't cost as much as a stand alone player because the Cell and RSX can take care of a lot of the stuff Chuck Norris will need to do to be able to read the disks
* Fall release date for Chuck Norris, no release date for online service, but expected to launch with the system
I'm sure many of the people who read my drivel are as much a fan of image manipulation comedy as I am. With that in mind, I feel the need to not bogart something I discovered the other day which will make future hypothetical humorous image manipulations much easier:
This evening I unwittingly took part in something really clever. My blog just got a trackback from a post on Sean Gleeson's blog, and upon checking it out I was pleasantly surprised to see the results of a really clever little experiment. I'm going to have to try this sometime.
See, one of my internet heroes (Lore of The Brunching Shuttlecocks fame) has a new project under way entitled Bad Gods. Apparently it is kind of based on the idea of YTMND in that it combines animation and audio clips, but will allegedly be more flexible than YTMND is. In what can only be described as an awesome move, Lore has decided to Creative Commons license all the shorts he created under the Bad Gods name. Unfortunately this has caused him a little bit of worry.
So I'm drawing this guy, trying to decide on a hairstyle, kind of working out his personality in my mind, and I suddenly realize: anyone will be able to do anything with this character. In other people's hands he could be given a completely different personality and made to do horrible things.
Should I even be worried about this?
Then not too long after that, he gave the world a first peek at one of these new creative commons licensed characters.
You can probably guess where I am going with this, but to make a long story short: I made Glen do horrible things.
Since Lore is playing Creative Commons, I decided I needed to make a CC licensed character as well, to um, interact with Glen. So with that done, I needed some Creative Commons music to add to the mix. After lots and lots of searching (it is really damn hard to find music of this sort!) I settled on a clip from The Boston Jerk, by Wayne&Wax, a band that encourages sampling and licenses under the Creative Commons.
I was going to post my creation on YTMND, but they are taking forever to mail me my confirmation, so I decided to just go ahead and post it on my site instead. You can view it here.
It can't get much worse than this Lore, so I hope this makes you feel somewhat better. Now you can stop worrying about how it might happen and get back to working on releasing some of it to us hungry fans.
I was just looking through my referral stats, and found that I've been getting some hits from some random person's MySpace page. I headed on over there to see what was what and found that she was using the crappy Natalie Portman mohawk pic as a tiled background on her site.
The only problem with the superb web RSS reader service Bloglines is that from time to time they go down for maintenance, leaving people like me completely at a loss as to what to read. I don't know what sites I read on a daily basis, Bloglines knows that for me, and without them I am lost. Bad Bloglines!
Whenever they are down, they have this cute image of the Bloglines Plumber that they put up, which always makes me smile. Today though, they've mixed it up a bit. In case a few of you haven't already seen it, here is today's version: